Emotional intelligence and Zen Flow

So, this week was interesting. I ran into some burnout and roadblocks. Actually this week and last week. So what did I do? Did I freak out? over eat? maybe both , just a little. But I alos tried to take what I learned in the EI self assesment and use it in my tough times.  Normally I would look for a way out of something that causes me to stress, even when the stress will pass and I should figure out a way to finish whatever I started on.  I still havent completely broke out of my old ways but it does take time.  So on my EI I get a 1 on self awareness. I feel that I am in touch with myself and whats going on around me and how I relate to all that. How I control my reactions in times of stress.  I get  a 5 in self managment. Like I said I have a long ways to go ont his one. I do look forward to implementing what I have learned to help myself overcome certain pitfalls that keep me from managing myself in the best ways.  I get a 1 on social awarness, I am so good at assesing peoples moods and trying to help them overcome and deal with whatever negative emotions that they may be experiencing.  I get a 5 on relationship management. Mostly because I tend to be a hermit. A complete hermit, I can only take people in small doses, I never used to be like this, I was the total opposite, a social butterfly, a helper to all in need. I did have a life changing experience that I feel caused me to step away from people, I need to change this, for my profession that I want to go into but in a way I rather enjoy the thought of moving to a remote cabin in the woods and doing a Phycologist radio show. I can still help people, but be away too lol. With that being said and the second part of this assignment is  part of the reason I will tell you about my moment of total flowwww. The moment in time I remember the best as being completely absorbed and time was a theory that did not exsist was when I was in the mountains and I was just sitting there thinking about my life, and my decisions and where I wanted to be.  This sense of absolute peace and happiness flooded my body and I felt like I was capable of doing anything at that moment.  The cabin in the remote wilderness appeals to me because of the beauty and peacefullness.  This combo makes me feel like I can accomplish anything I want to. I can be creative, I can work with clarity and revel in the tasks at hand, whatever that may be. 

Learning Tips

So, this week , I learned about the way the right side of the brain works versus the left side. Like right brained people are more apt to be creative in the arts and left brains are more able to think analytically. I had to wonder since I'm neither artsy nor particularly good at figuring out algebra.  This should not stop anyone from trying to improve either side and exercise the old thinker.  Especially since I have started at APOU, I feel more in control of my abilities to do the things I thought I couldn't do.  It goes with the study tips I listened to, I listened to achieving your goals and learned how important it is to start with baby steps and celebrate those small, attainable victories then gradually increase to bigger goals.  I also wanted to try to better my vocabulary. So the two study tips on building your vocabulary was especially helpful. 

Powerful Questions

I don't normally think about these things over much, I mean, I do think about my future but not in any real depth. I have always been a go with the flow and figure it out if I have to. So, all this deep self examination has not come easy at all for me. I have really had to dig deep to even think of anything that sounded academic-ish. So, here I go, My first set of questions about future came out like this; 1. How do I want to use my degree? assumption: I will get a degree. 2. After receiving my degree, how do I envision my life changing? assumption: earning a degree will definitely change my life. 3. What new opportunities will open up for me? assumption: I will have more opportunity in my life due to having a higher education.  My questions I ask myself during my time in studies at apou; 1. Is this the right degree for me? Assumption: uncertainty 2. Do I feel fulfilled by what I am learning? assumption: My classes have meaning. 3. Am I applying what I am learning to my everyday life and finding it to be useful? assumption: The assignments are designed to help me grow as a person. Questions I ask those people who are closest to me; 1. Are you satisfied with what you have accomplished thus far in your life? assumption: you are responsible for your happiness in your life. 2. Do you know what Gods purpose for your life is? assumption: God has a purpose for all humans. 3. Do you recognize your natural talents and use them for the greater good? assumption: all humans have been blessed with natural gifts and talents.  Bonus question, do you believe in Sasquatch? lol. just kidding. So on to my Curiosity Challenge, I scored a 16 in stretching and a 12 in embracing. I do like to seek out new knowledge and experiences as long as they are my choosing. I am only willing to embrace new things, again if it's a new thing I want to try. I am trying, it's hard, because I already want to freak out over the APA format papers!! eek! those kinds of papers scare me they seem so difficult and intimidating. I will try to embrace them.

Vital Friends

This week I learned alot about my own strengths and those of my vital friends. I learned the role that these peole play in my life, there is not many, only one very close friend. My friend Desi, is my best friend and we have so much in common. We think alike and act a like, in the role of builder she helps me so much, builds me up and encourages me to keep on going when I want to throw in the towel and quit.  Desi is also my champion, always there cheering me on, we both have the same beliefs she is totally a loyal friend and I can trust her completely.  She is my collabroator, we have the same interests and enjoy the same things.  Desi is like my own energizer bunny always up and happy.  She challenges my mind and helps me to explore new avenues of thought.  My top five strengths were Individualization, input, learner, intellection, and context. I agree with these as being my top five but I also thought that I should have had harmony and peace in there as well. I really dont see any conflicts with my strengths. Others may think Im to introverted because I am often quiet as a result of constantly thinking and studying other people but when approached I am very friendly. 

My Mission Statement

This week I have done allot of soul searching and learning about what it takes for me to succeed in reaching the goals I have set for myself. I Will do this is by making a personal mission statement my statement is this: 1. Develop a winners attitude that will enable me to know that I can finish what I set my mind to. 2. I will implement my goals based on personal responsibility only I can make my life what I want it to be.  3.I Will begin each day with a schedule to keep myself on track and I will check it at the end of the day to see what I have achieved. 4. Iwill prioritze my tasks daily so that I know what needs to be done and I will make sure assignments are turned in on time. 5. I will ask my husband to help me by gently reminding me of my goals and help me to remain accountable to my new goals so that they become habits. I feel now that I can do this because I am now more determined to finish the things I start I am excited about what I see in my future and really desire to succeed. My life seems full of opportunity and possibilities now that I never felt I had before, I never believed that I could be good at anything and settled for the life I was living. After doing a lot of these assignments, I find that they have opened my eyes about myself I know now that I can do anything I want to and having a mission statement is going to be a big help in my quest to change my life and create the life I always dreamed about.

Personal Responsibility

First off, I was quite surprised by the results of my personal assessment. My locus of control was a 2, and it showed that I was moderately pessimistic with a low self esteem. After listening to the audio lecture and reading about my results I realized some things about myself that I either ignored or just didn't realize. I always thought of myself as being more optimistic but I realized that in reality I was more or less waiting and counting on good things to happen to me instead of choosing to make those things I desired happen. I really received a lot of important eye opening information out of that assignment. As I began to read chapter 2 in the On Course book titled, Accepting Personal Responsibility, I was in for yet another surprise. I had always heard loud and clear the negative inner critic voice and I listened to that voice, believing that I was just being honest with myself. While I was being honest, at the same time I was giving into the Inner defender and then giving up altogether. I was so hard on myself and had unrealistic expectations for myself that if I failed on one task I automatically would assume that I would fail on all the rest, I would just completely give up. After reading reading this chapter I felt really motivated and excited I saw that I had been telling myself that I couldn't and wouldn't ever be able to accomplish the things my heart desired, I was so filled with fear but at the same time willing to try. My heart and mind really resonated with the statement in the chapter that said, "The essence of personal responsibility is responding wisely to life's opportunities and challenges, rather than waiting passively for luck or other people to make the choice for us." When I read that it was like a light bulb went off and I recognized that that was what I had been doing all my life. I was waiting around for what I wanted to happen happen, instead of making the choice to do what was necessary to make my life head in the direction of my desires and goals, whatever it took. Look at challenges as an opportunity to learn and grow and realize that the old saying, " If it is to be, it is up to me." Such a simple concept and now I am ready and eager to move forward and grab the bull by the horns and make my goals a reality.

Week one assignment, self assessment

Results from Self-Assessment Activity from Downing OnCourse
-----------------------------------------------------------

Student:    Elizabeth McMullin
Instructor: 
Course:     

Your Score:    Self-Assessment Area:
-----------    ---------------------
    68            Score #1: Accepting Personal Responsibility
    60            Score #2: Discovering Self-Motivation
    29            Score #3: Mastering Self-Management
    44            Score #4: Employing Interdependence
    59            Score #5: Gaining Self-Awareness
    42            Score #6: Adopting Lifelong Learning
    63            Score #7: Developing Emotional Intelligence
    48            Score #8: Believing in Myself

Score Range:    Scores Within This Range Indicate...
------------    ---------------------------------------------------------------
  0 - 39        ...an area where your choices will seldom get you on course.
40 - 63        ...an area where your choices will sometimes get you on course.
64 - 80        ...an area where your choices will usually keep you on course.

1. Write about the areas on the self-assessment in which you had
   your highest scores.

By doing the self-assessment, I also learned that I... do accept responsibility for
my actions. I do not blame others for my lack of progress in my desire to have a
degree or my unhappiness of my situation in life. I feel good about the fact that I
am honest with myself because I know lying to ones self only makes reaching
your goals that much more difficult. It also makes reaching your goals a lot longer.


2. Write about the areas of the self-assessment in which you had
   your lowest scores.

By doing the self-assessment, I also learned that I...am a very disorganized
person and I think it stems from the fact that I can be a very lazy person. I am
occasionally depressed and when that happens things I need or want to
accomplish come to a complete stand still. I also allow negative thoughts and
beliefs that I have about my abilities to finish college scare me away from
finishing. I have yet to figure out why I get so scared and nervous about school,
but I really really want a degree. It has been a want of mine for a very long time.